New York City seems to be the consumer capital of the US – everything seems to be defined by outward symbols of wealth. This might be a result of the industry I’ve chosen to work in and the type of people that are usually attracted to it, but even outside of my profession I have seen this trend. The default here is always to do things that cost money to enjoy life: go to a bar for a drink despite having a bottle at home, go out to a diner to eat regardless if you have the same bacon and eggs sitting in your fridge, go to a movie for $15 instead of watching something slightly older on the huge TV in your living room. I wasn’t even aware that different behavior was possible until I visited my partner’s family and they seemed to have a much happier life without a lot of these outings that have become normal for me. Not only do they often have people over for home cooked meals instead of being served in a room full of strangers, but they also obviously value people over things — time over money maybe.
This is not the case in New York. I found it hard to get my friends to stop going to the default of spending money to feel good or even just feel normal. However, I’ve taken a new approach and have been pretty successful this winter – simply by taking the initiative and planning activities at our homes. This default of outsourcing everything isn’t just apparent in the way we eat and claim to relax, but I surprisingly found it unconsciously creeping into my thoughts today about something ordinary.
My partner and I were discussing making waffles for breakfast on a waffle maker we’ve had for a year and never used. I mentioned that the local grocery store was having a sale on waffle mix. He was confused by that and said he’d just get ingredients to make waffles ourselves – and look at that. We were only missing one ingredient. I was taken aback. My first thought was to find something I can buy to fit this specific need of mine, not how I can make it myself. This surprised me since I have seen how I’ve been getting better at a more DIY type of thinking, but this new mindset hadn’t infiltrated all aspects of my mind. There is more work to be done, but I think I’m starting down the right track.