I had a thought during a rare visit to the gym. The idea was solidified by reading a blog post by my new blog obsession, Brave New Life. It’s the fact that everyone with a job spends most of their days and most of their life with people they did not choose, doing activities they did not choose. Further, when someone introduces themselves at a party and says they’re an insurance claims adjuster I may have a vague idea of what that means, but I have no idea what their day to day life is like. His or her family has no idea. Most of what they experience in a day is shared with strangers who are competing for money. It’s just such a strange thought in my mind.
When a family arrives home from two separate jobs and two separate schools none of them have shared that day. They must ask the stereotypical questions “How was your day? How was work? How was school?” because the days of the other family members are unimaginable to them. I can’t think of another phenomenon that is similar to this. At least in school the level of competition seems not as high or aggressive as in the workplace so schools did not feel as isolating and soul sucking to me as work does. A fake building with fake friends (coworkers) and fake tasks (busy work).
In the workplace it has been difficult for me to make real friends. It might be because of the competitive nature of advertising – we are constantly competing for promotions. Or I was. I’ve freed myself from waiting for someone to notice that I am worth it. Instead I just go get what I want. But at work everyone (or most people if they want to fit in) put on the mask of professionalism, which makes it quite difficult to get to know people and learn their true passions and motivations. Somehow knowing the person underneath the mask has become almost impossible and showing your true self is even seen as a weakness.
I do not want to be surrounded by these masked people. I don’t want to be forced to visit a simulated environment for 12 hours a day. I don’t want to fight my way onto a stuffed subway car while dodging creepy men and pickpockets before my work day even begins. I want something real. I want an unsimulated life. I want a life that I share with the people I love. I want to reclaim the lost hours.
I’m binge-reading your blog posts right now since I just learned about you on the Bigger Pockets Money Podcast, and I’m loving it! This article speaks to me especially…. I’m dreaming and trying my hardest to become financially independent enough to be able to have a life with more freedom. My days feel gray because of my boring job, and everything you said about being separate from your family, doing meaningless tasks with people you don’t like or even know is just crazy!!! Congrats on retirement later this year. You’re an inspiration!
Oh WOW – you went deep into the archives! So happy you’re enjoying the blog. It really is wild what the modern working world is like – especially since we can all be connected through the internet (and therefore don’t need to be away from our families to work…) I’m sorry your job is making your days gray. I hope you can find a balance to make it more enjoyable on the path to financial independence. For me that was moving across the country to a place with natural beauty and starting to work from home. And thank you so much!! That’s so nice – you just made my day 🙂 .
Hey I was introduced to your blog by Choose FI podcast. Been binging through it ever since.
I just had to leave a comment here to say I have always thought it is absolutely mental we see more of our colleagues than our family and friends. And what is even weirder people/society just accept this as a norm! So this blog post really resonated with me. I’m in a different position than you FI wise and work in a field that can be rewarding (nursing) but we seem to think so much alike. Thanks for this blog, keep up the good work!
Hi Minnie – Welcome! I’m so glad you’ve been enjoying it. It really is mental and ridiculous we are used to/accept it. Thank you for letting me know it resonated with you! I’m happy to hear I’m not the only one. Will do! Thank you for stopping by.
Heh. I’m also starting from the beginning of your archives. Your blog was recommended during the Financial Feminist Summit put on by Kara from We Bravely Go. Enjoying it so far. 🙂
Cool! I didn’t know she recommended me. Glad you’re enjoying it so far – let me know if that changes 😉 .
Wow. What an amazing read. I follow you on ig and never sat to really read through your blog and I am so glad this is what I am doing on a Friday night. THIS RIGHT HERE is why I want financial independence. My time. My families time and being with them 24/7, through every good and bad, and having the CHOICE to do whatever I want with that time. On to the next post. Love it here.
Well you just made my Friday night 🙂 ! I’m so glad you agree and WOW you’re really diving into the archives. Very impressive! Enjoy 😉 .
I have been following for a while on Instagram and been reading everything I could about FIRE when corona hit 3 years ago. I decided to go through all of your posts this coming weeks and decided to leave a message on this one because I find it so accurate! I have been in the same boat as you (lost my mother at age 46) and ever since (but even before when i was a kid) asked myself the question “what are we all doing on this small planet and why is everyone doing the same thing (wasting time)”? I am on my path to fire and hope to get there in 4 more years. Thanks for being an inspirations. <3
Hi! That’s wild you’re going through so many posts – I’m glad they’re legible 😉 .
I’m happy this one resonated with you – it was my biggest frustration during my career. Life’s too short 🙂 . Congratulations on being on the path to FIRE! 4 years is super close. You’ve got this!