WARNING: If you don’t want to hear about blood you will not like this story 🙂
I’ve been known to do a few weird things to save money. The most recent one involved bleeding all over our living room. I was perusing the website for my new health insurance (through my job) and noticed something awesome: they offer $100 if I get a blood test and health assessment. To combat my laziness they even send it right to your home. Hmm! Not only did I want the money, but I was also was curious. I have very small veins (there’s your weird fact for the day!) and people literally can’t take my blood. Even the…blood professionals…is that what they’re called? I haven’t had my blood successfully taken since I was in high school and as a result I have no idea what’s going on in there.
Another fortuitous coincidence was that the packet arrived a little after I started the keto diet so I could use my numbers as a bit of a baseline to see if it improved with my diet like it should. I opened the packet and followed the instructions. I guess as a result of never being able to bleed my body got a little excited and started bleeding everywhere. I only pricked my finger, but soon the table, my paperwork and a few unfortunate pens were covered in my blood. I had to call my partner in from the other room to get me paper towels because the little gauze in the packet wasn’t doing anything. I hope I didn’t shock them with the amount of blood on my paperwork…but something tells me they would be used to it by now.
A few weeks later I got my results and they were pretty good! No risk factors for anything which is awesome. I’m curious how they’ve improved over the last few months. As a surprise bonus it turns out that not only do I get $100 (which I already spent on groceries. Free food = score!) but my monthly premium also decreases signifigantly going forward. I assume that’s because they know now I’m healthy and I’m no longer a black box. I wonder if they increase the premium if they find out your insides are a garbage bin…that would be quite the bait and switch. So overall I’m going to save a few hundred dollars a year on healthcare and had free groceries for about a month. I think this might have been the weirdest thing I’ve done to save money.